Sabina's Inbox

Okay, you're probably confused about this title so let me explain but before I do, first and foremost I want to say that I am not a bully and in no way is this post meant to make anyone feel inferior to anyone and/or bad about themselves. This is a collection of my thoughts after a recent encounter with a new acquaintance.

Okay, so let's just dive in.

Unseasoned chicken and why it is better than you.
A monologue by me.

Recently I had met a girl while out with my friends, it was random and totally unexpected and I want to add that this girl was indeed a nice person. I'm not going to pretend she had the personality of Amy Schumer and Tina Fey combined into an super siyan amazing girlfriend but she was indeed sweet. A tad of an airhead but nonetheless not a nuisance to be around.

So, I also want to iterate that I do not feel ugly when standing next to beautiful women, I have never felt inferior to another woman. If I didn't like something about myself, it never comes out because of jealousy towards another woman, it's an on going insecurity and I either fix it or get over it. Simple as that. In other words, I don't think I'm ugly. I don't, I really don't think I have the hottest face or body in the world but I know I can hold my own in a room full of "bad bitches."

This also goes for my friends, my besties can hold their own and I've seen Scottie, Duke and Michael think that they are the bees knees time and time again. Basically my point is, me and my friends are a pleasant looking bunch, we wear makeup and do so well. We've been taking care of our bodies more so than ever recently so we're more fit than we've ever been. We're very "girlie," between us are a mixture of abs, boobs and booties, heels, overpriced clothing and accessories and what I think are sense of humors created by the big man himself sprinkled with awesome.

But that night, we weren't lucking out in the men's department. Guys didn't really seem to look our way as much and at first we blamed it on the group of insanely beautiful model gay men to our right more interested in each other than whether my friend Charlotte's boobs are real or fake and how Amelia fit her ass in that tiny romper but our lies didn't last us long. Today was just one of those nights where maybe my contour wasn't on point or something as equally ridiculous.

Come in unseasoned chicken.

Now right off the bat when I came in to our select private and exclusive location aka a regular bar. I noticed instantly that this girl was cuddled up with her boyfriend by the bar, I hadn't known she was with our group of friends until a rendezvous in the bathroom that I'll elaborate later on. So I walked in and immediately my friends pointed me in the direction of if-it-worked-out-future-ex-husband and yes, they were right. They knew my type so I spent the majority of my time staring at the back of his head because he may have been tall but clearly oblivious to the fun sized semi-drunk but still classy, of course girl running around in a leotard, that's me in case you guys haven't caught on.

Any who, after about 15 minutes I decided to go to the bathroom to check my face and make sure that I didn't look like Elvira coming out of a sauna. And who do I see coming in behind me? But the girl from the bar who was with her supposed boyfriend.

She immediately started talking to me and I was kind of taken back because there was no form of transition sentence to get me to realize she's talking to me but she was. She went into a tirade that she couldn't stand the guy at the bar and that he needed to leave her alone. I was confused because I thought that was her boyfriend since she was caressing his arm and laughing at all his jokes but hey, to each their own, mon cheri. I told her if she needed help, I'd pull her away as soon as we got back by the bar where our friends (who she's apparently came with.. I had no idea) were at.

Let me say again that this girl was adamant that she did. not. like. the. guy. Sing it with me, did not like the guyyyyyyy. Whatsoeverrrrrrrr. So I shit you not my little minions, she literally as soon as we both walked back to the bar and by our friends (still have no idea where she came from and neither do they but fuck it) she says, out loud "Oh.. he left? Why would he leave? I just went to the bathroom for a second." With the saddest looking puppy dog eyes like she'd been stabbed through the heart, now you can imagine my face at this moment because I am very bad at hiding my emotions.

So I already labeled her mentally as "that girl" and we all know "that girl" we've been friends with her, most still are and we secretly can't stand her but she's been our friend so long we can't get rid of her. Still, I don't like to immediately judge, I mentally label it like its a strike one, get three strikes and I will never, under any circumstances willingly hang out with said person again.

Now you'll be happy to know that was her only strike of the day, the rest of the day was.. well.. interesting.

Okay, to elaborate a bit more on said girl, you need to know what she looked like, at least in an overall sense. She was that she was the definition of plain Jane. She looked like a plainer less curvy looking Melissa Joan Hart via 1999, she had no makeup on and her skin wasn't good but wasn't bad. She had her blonde hair up in what I think was suppose to be a ponytail. She was wearing a cross between a burlap sack and a shower curtain. That's not a lie, she really was. She was insanely thin, so much so that she was very boney looking. Her shoulder blade could cut me which is probably the only thing sexy about her but she was flatter than a female swimmer in a one piece and her ass was essentially nonexistent.

Now in none of this am I trying to say she's ugly, she is not ugly. Not at all, not a little bit but she is the most boring looking person I have ever seen in my life. Just plain. I wouldn't call her beautiful if my life depended on it and her slight shit personality wasn't really helping either, I wish I could post a picture but I would never do that to her.

Of course, you're probably wondering what this girl has to do with this post and why I'm even talking about her, well my friends, this is girl is unseasoned chicken. I mean it, she is in every way, shape and form the analogy of unseasoned chicken.

We all like chicken. We do unless we're vegans but that's a whole other ball game I refuse to touch upon but for the most part, what's wrong with chicken? Nothing. But how do we like our chicken? Some like it sauteed, some broiled, some fried and some grilled but all of us, in one way or another like a taste to our chicken whether it be salt and/or BBQ. The choices vary but they all come down to seasoning.

Nobody wants to eat unseasoned chicken.

Yeah.. no.. apparently a lot of people want to eat unseasoned chicken.

So listen, as I said before we've all been hit on, many times over and maybe this has happened to me and my friends before but we were just too drunk to notice but this time, watching as a third party privy to a show that you don't want to be at was really eye-opening.

Basically, the entire night and I mean the entire night we went to three bars. In each and every bar from the moment unseasoned chicken stepped in she got hit on by everyone, ugly, fat, hot, skinny, tall, short, black, white, asian, middle eastern, mixed, athletic and/or women. They waited in line for her.. GUYS.. there was a lined formed to hit on this girl and I was both equally impressed and confused.

I needed to know, I did. That night I almost wanted to ask her. Like tell me your secret unseasoned chicken, let me in on what it is, is it your perfume? Is it your ditzy personality or is it that you pretend to be oblivious to the parade of men following you everywhere you go like you're the pied piper. I mean, it was down right impressive y'all. I can't even hate on that, I may be a bit too frank about her appearance and personality but the amount of men was extraordinary. I have never seen anything like it and I have friends who are models. She deserves a slow clap turned into a standing ovation.

Obviously, this led me to question everything I've ever known about men. So I came out with a conclusion, we are all suppose to essentially be unseasoned chicken. Wait, don't you dare tell me I'm getting rid of individuality, I am not.

I'm saying we are suppose to be women who are selfish when we need be, whether it be letting a guy go when he's not good for us or reeling him in when we see a big fish we like, not just prancing around in a leotard hoping the constant eye contact will work.

We don't need to wear 40lbs of makeup only to impress men and/or skin tight dresses to show off our figures. We don't need to play games and disregard a man we actually like that comes up to say hello to us because we are trying to play hard to get. In fact, I recently saw a man on a train (I'm definitely writing a separate post about this later) that was my mental picture of perfect. PERFECT. And what do you think I did when he looked at me and smiled? I got nervous and looked away. Damn me and my brainwashing that girls are suppose to play hard to get. Damn it all over.

We need to stop thinking about things surrounding or being around the idea of what a man wants from us. It's what we want from us, do we like our dress that we can't breathe in or the double mink eyelashes you paid 34 dollars for that are heavy as hell? Are you doing it because you love this makeup and that dress you can't dance in, or are you doing it because you think he, whoever he is, will?

Because you're wrong, if anything unseasoned chicken proved to us that being you, no matter who you are is just going to be best so if you are an inner makeup guru and your highlight is so bright it could blind me then fuck yes, baby do it, do you! And if you get off on wearing pasties under a c-thru top with c-thru matching leggings then by all means, be my guest and go kill it out there.

The point is to stop, stop wondering what the magic potion is, what you're not doing or doing wrong. It's all about you and who you are. And unseasoned or not, the girl has taught me something. There's a reason why most of us don't like "that girl," it's because she doesn't give a rats ass what we think of her. Because she knows, that it's not just about your looks and personality but how you carry it and how much you don't care whether he'll like how you do.

So thank you unseasoned chicken and may the rest of us follow in your footsteps.

xo Binch