Sabina's Inbox

Any who, as we were exiting our vehicle we didn't even walk down an entire block before we saw a girl and a guy standing in the middle of the street. She was basically in a near ninja pose and was thirty seconds from probably kicking him in the balls and punching him in the diaphragm. She even did the whole poking in the chest thing. He on the other hand looked uncaring, well, that was before he saw us. 

She was wailing about how he will not disrespect her like this in public in what seemed to be a Russian accent, something eastern european sounding and how she can't take it anymore. Now I want you to know she was loud. I mean she was BOSE surround system loud. And the guy who seemed like he really didn't care, realllllly started to care when he saw a group of girls walking by. 

Of course he started acting like a douchebag and began the whole "Are you done? Are you done?" chant loudly. Soon as we walked past them, the screams were coming from both people and it was honestly just a shit show and really uncomfortable for third parties like myself and my friends. 

We laughed about the incident but as always I wondered about it for a few minutes after while my friends were probably staring at that insanely hot blonde man (who's probably gay) to our right by Hector's place. 

So as always I immense myself into the scenario and wonder why? Now listen, I'm all for him probably deserving it and I'm not so clueless to not assume she may just be a crazy bitch but one thing I'm gonna judge the hell out of both of them for is that public mess that they created that initiated a shit loud of stares and people looking. 

Now you may think I'm crazy for what I'm about to say but I don't care, we women need to fucking take a damn chill pill. Yes, I said it and yes I've been that girl before that has been furious at a guy in a public place but I will say this, I have never cursed off my boyfriend or anyone that I was seeing in public like that in my entire life. Now do not think I'm some kind of saint that's never yelled a man off so bad that he probably wanted to stab me, I have but for the love of pearl there is a time and place for everything. 

And then there's the aspect of what if he did something really bad in front of her, like making out with his ex or screwing someone in a bathroom. Doesn't he deserve a harsh dose of reality and some really unfriendly words? Of course he does, he deserves for his penis to fall off due to gangrene but like I said there is a time and place for everything. 

For example, if he says something that embarrasses you. Laugh it off, seriously ladies let's be classy together, laugh it off and smile. When you get a moment give him that look. He knows what it is, he knows whats coming and he's probably going to kiss your ass the rest of the night trying to make up for it. 

But under no circumstance do you ever let a third party know that at this very moment you want to rip his head off. You are a couple, you are a "we," so fucking act like it, you keep your dirty laundry and your anger to yourself until you're in private. 

Another example, let's say an ex says hello to him and you want him to give her the finger and proceed to obnoxiously kiss you in front of her as if you're two kids in high school. Yeah, most men aren't gonna do that cause it's like suppppppppper childish. Thank goodness but let's say he says hi to her and gives her a hug and she's goes on her merry way and you're sitting there like someone lit a fire under your ass. 

Now ladies this is where it gets real. You need to chill. YOU NEED TO FUCKING CHILL. Now if he cheated on you before with said girl then you're just a moron for staying and shouldn't even be in that situation. I'm allowed to say that because I've been in that position and I stayed so when I tell you, you're a dumb bitch it's because I have had dumb bitch tendencies when I was younger. So as a fully recovered dumb bitch I can genuinely tell you, to relax and listen to me. 

If he's not sleeping with her and you know he's over her and she's probably got a boyfriend and doesn't give two shits and a half about you, why does it matter? He's being polite. He's being a man. And an adult. Who cares that he said hello? That's your damn insecurities talking, eating you alive. You know when a girl wants your man, you knowwww because what do women do? They make shit painfully obvious and unless she's legit posting subtweets damn near tagging your ass and making your life a genuine hell, then calm your tits. You look insanely amazing in the eyes of anyone looking at you if you sit there and smile, and if you even say hello to her, girl you deserve a noble peace prize because you are what probably every man in the world is looking for, the damn golden egg.

So my advice in that situation is to shove your insecurities elsewhere, I know it's hard. I've been there but you can't let what your mind has construed to blind you from what the truth really is. 

And lastly, the big one. He cheated or he did something disgusting like put his face in some rando's titties at some bar or nightclub while you're literally there watching (ladies if you're going to go to a strip club with your boyfriend, be forewarned that, this may not apply.) Well then I have only one piece of advice for you, especially when you're outside screaming at him for disrespecting you for the last time. Well guess what, my soon to be recovering dumb bitch. It's alllllllll your fault. Yup, yeah I said it. It is, listen it's like this.. the first time shit goes left you have to make a decision. Are you going to forgive him? Or are you gonna call it what it is and move on? You're making a decision one way or another and I know how much you love him and how much he promises he's not gonna do it again and blah blah blah blah. 

But seriously? 

Seriously?

You know your man, you know what he's capable of and whether he really did make a mistake in Vegas cause he was high of shrooms and drank three bottles of liquor and you made the conscious decision to believe him that it was a mistake. 

And you also know when he's been lying to you from the beginning and has two phones and you've already forgiven him like three (thousand) times for dumb shit including cheating then well? It's your fault. 

How can you be standing outside screaming you're tired of him embarrassing you when you're literally letting him embarrass you every damn day by just staying with him. Everyone around you knows what's going on and knows he's going to do some dumb crap in public (or private) and the farthest you go is embarrassing yourself by making a scene in front of a nightclub. 

You know what that girl should've done (if what he did was wrong) was just walk away. Leave. Call an uber, go home. Turn your phone off, lock your doors (if he's got a key, put a damn oven behind it for all I care) but just walk away. Why are you prolonging the inevitable? 

You're clearly hurt and wailing like a bat shit crazy monkey so instead of being a trashy wench screaming at some guy outside, be the classy girl. Pack up and leave. If he really changes for you, then sweetheart God bless you, you're one of few and thank your lucky stars and if he's still the same douche, then screw it. You've got something else for you out there. 

And the only advice I have to men and this is to good men. Really, I mean it. You know you're a good boyfriend and if you're ever in this situation where your crazy girlfriend is yelling at you for literally no reason or her own insecurities. I know you love her but she's only going to get worse as time goes on so just look her dead in the face, make absolutely no emotion as she yells (and you have to mean it, don't go running back) and tell her that you've had it and this time, you are done. 

One of two things are gonna happen, she's gonna straighten up reallllllllll quick and try to contain her crazy as time goes on because she's scared to lose you or she's another guy's problem and you go sip pina coladas on vaca with that hot chick that's always smiling at you when you see her in the coffee shop. 

Anywho, stop being crazy y'all. 

Oh and last but not least, if you've got a crazy boyfriend who gets mad when you step outside, it's time for that restraining order honey bunches. 

xo 

Binch

p.s.s. I recently saw unseasoned chicken at a bar and you'll be happy to know she's as unseasoned as ever, prospering in a (are you ready) unseasoned top and gosh, I love her.