Sabina's Inbox

From as long as I can remember, I was raised to always "think like, act like and be a lady." Don't get me wrong, even I myself can't control how I react when I'm mad, sometimes I let the decades of teaching fly right over my head and into the passenger seat of an angry driver. Anywho, we just started and I'm already off topic. The thing is, this isn't even about me, this is about a close friend that I care about and how she did something that was definitely out of her usual m.o. and how I actually understand why.

Charlotte.
Charlotte that minx.
Of all the bars in all the world, she had to walk into his.

See, I'm the best story teller out of my friends. I can make a trip to Ben & Jerry's sound like a vacation to Fiji, granted their ice cream does hold it's weight in awesome anyway. So I'm going to tell you a crazy, frank and ridiculous story about how my dear, adorable, sweet, good girl friend lost her virginity.

I know what you're thinking, what in the actual fudge?

Wait, it gets good, keep reading.

Now if you've been on my blog before than you've read one of my older posts, "the virginity crisis of 1920," well virginity crisis no more, it's sailed, flew the coup, gone like the wind, never to come back, basically you catch my drift. My dear sweet biffle is no longer a girl but has now become a woman.

I said that last sentence out loud because I needed a good laugh, say it out loud too, it only gets funnier.

So to begin, somewhere in the middle of October, global warming had it's perks, it was genuinely a beautiful night, it was warm and we went to a bar that we use to be regulars at. The night had started like every other night, I vowed not to drink (but then had 3 beers because my obsession with beer is real, i'll save that for another blog post, another time) and my girls were downing their skinny girl specialities aka vodka soda with a splash of cranberry like usual.

We had already reached the end of our night, we danced, we laughed, we flirted, we even argued with a few bitches, it was literally a regular night for us. So it's around 130am, give or take and we're all talking about whether we want to go eat after this or we'll stay a little longer. So we're literally in the middle of a discussion when this adonis of a human being walks towards us.

Now listen, let me explain..

When I say adonis, I'm not talking about your run of the mill, light eyed college boyfriend who spent weekends in the gym. I'm talking about the perfect type of guy, that level of hot that stops you in your tracks, to a point where you secretly like his photos on IG ready to risk it all, the guy that walks by you and you risk a backhand to the head from your significant other just for a peak, the type of guy that even some of my gay girlfriends were like "well, I'd try anything once" and hot enough where the gay guy friends say "ugh, why do you straight bitches get all the hot guys." Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he was fucking beautiful. He was so attractive that I saw him from across the bar walking towards us and instantly wondered if he had a pretty last name and what he would thinks about monogrammed bath towels.

Now hear me out, I know you just read how hot I thought he was but know this, that when my girls, any of them get approached by an unrealistically attractive male, it's all love. I am their biggest cheerleader, there is no jealousy, no hate, if anything I start devising plans on making sure that they make it down the aisle. So when beelined towards us and turned and approached my dear friend Charlotte, I shed a tear of triumph because that man was Joseph Cannata hot.

I know, I know, it's superficial and ridiculous but do you men really think women don't think about good looking men the way you think about us? You think we don't appreciate a beautiful face on an amazing body with a nice ass. Well we do and sometimes, when it's their pretty enough, we also don't think. Or maybe we do.

So I'm going to give this man a name, that being Mr. Hotpants, because he was indeed, hot in his pants. So Mr. Hotpants is all over Charlotte, totally and she is like a fish out of water. She literally looked around confused what he was doing over here while me and Amelia were waving a symbolic gold crest of honor like you fucking go girl.

So Mr. Hotpants and Charlotte hit it off, he is literally salivating looking at her. They spent hours after that together being like an adorable couple on their honeymoon. They even shared an adorable kiss but like the type you don't expect in a bar, either this mofo had some amazing game or he was head over heels for a girl he just met.

And the truth is, life is fickle and sometimes the people you want to end up with and timing in your life do not line up. They both went their separate ways, exchanged numbers and were destined into texting eternity since we all knew, Charlotte had made her stance, sex and love must go hand in hand.

Wellllllllllllll..

I mean..

Not always you know, like..

LOL. Seriously, what happened next I couldn't have predicted in a million years. We've been down this road before, with Mr. Handsome, Mr. Pretty Eyes, Mr. Nice Hair, Mr. Trustfund and still, none of them ever got to that point with Charlotte. Except Hot Pants, yes Hot Pants, you and your pretty face were the golden ticket after all.

Now we don't need to explain what happened in the following days, I think we're all how intercourse works but what I do want to explain is the reasoning behind her choice.

Sometimes we wait for something that we think is going to be amazing (by the way, for her it was, this man apparently worked for cirque de soleil or some shit cause she still walks funny sometimes.) We think that within time, that moment, that thing, that man, that job or that point in our lives where we get what or who we want will come if we just wait.

Well fuck that.

Yeah you heard me.

Fuck that.

You want something, you want someone? You go out there and you get it and you don't stop until you get what you want (and I mean in general, don't go stalking your exes or future partners please, I can't help you in court, I never took the bar.)

The point is that life works in ways of opportunities, you have something right in front of you in the strangest ways, you don't pray for a miracle, you pray for the right person to come into your life, the right opportunity, the right moment and/or the right anything but at the end of the day, you miss it all since all you're doing is waiting. The point is you can't go on your life waiting for the right time, missing out on all the times that came before it assuming that, that wasn't for you because you'll end up in your life settling for things you normally wouldn't have even given the time of day.

You can't wait for prince charming, you can't wait to eventually quit your job one day and go after your dreams, you can't wait for the right Monday to start your diet, you can't wait until the right moment to leave toxic shit behind, you can't keep waiting assuming that within time you will get what you want if you not only don't work for it but disregard every opportunity that is thrown your way.

Here is a man, a good looking man, a man that would make her life easier. Do you know how hard it is to be a virgin in your 20s and explain to men that you aren't waiting for marriage, it isn't religious and you aren't some weirdo? It's tough, it was hard but I respected her decision and at the end of the day, if you ask her if she regrets losing her virginity (numerous times to him LOL) to a short fling that made her happy she will tell you no. So many of us have horrible first time stories and she got to tell hers with pride (not to mention a man that makes the rest of the male species look like their in the third stage of evolution.)

She got to pick the man she wanted after years of try outs, she got to remember him in the best light possible and she had what may have been the most fun first time story I had ever heard. She had an opportunity, whatever her true reasonings that even I may not know are, they are hers and hers alone. She was fed up, fed up with waiting, fed up with making up scenarios in her head when she had one right in front of her. So she took it, she stopped waiting for something that she realized she had romanticized through countless movies and romance novels and she came out a happier, less sexually stress and awesome female.

And since then, our dear Charlotte has more suitors than she knows what to do with, a six figure paying job, a brand new taste for designer wear and an apartment that most people can't afford with a view of Manhattan, so after that, I can tell you, Char, she never waited for another thing again, in fact.. she never missed another opportunity.

So what does all this mean?

Well my lovebugs, I hope you, whether it's your virginity, a small investment, an entry level job or just someone you aren't sure if you really like, take that chance and don't miss out on your next opportunity.


xoxo
Bina